2009-07-28 - 2:13 p.m.
Another weekend another fight with the insane. Just kidding - they call them people with personality disorders now.
Anyway - I've been googling and reading about all kinds of ways to interact with humans who have messed up ways of living their lives due to unfortunate circumstances and bad coping skills with their emotional regulation. I came across this quote that I truly need to keep in mind.
You’re in wise mind
when you can meet each moment of life as it is, not as you would have it be, and respond to it
skillfully.
That is so what I wish for my friend's therapy to help her with. Evil and I discussed a long time ago at the beginning of my friend's therapy what I wanted out of it for her and I stated that I want her to be able to own her actions and therefore be responsible for her own life. He thought that was a pretty low bar. But I think it's truly the answer to most of our own problems.
Don't have enough money to do everything you want? It's not someone else's actions that are causing this - it is your own. Go make more money. As Suze Orman says - it's the easiest thing in the world to do.
Going back to the quote, I realize that most of my arguments with this friend stem from her inability to operate in the world as it is, instead of how she feels it should be. Hours of arguments over how people shouldn't have to pay for medical care, so she won't which then exascerbates medical issues compounding them into even more expensive situations. Hours of arguments about how she shouldn't have to work because we should be socialists and not capitalists. This is compounding by her not working and not having money because she refuses to live in the world as it is.
I truly hope that someday she will be able to live in this world as it is, and not as it should be. We can both work then to make the changes we would like for this world, but not until we accept where we really are.
